Tonight, my best friends from high school & I got together for our annual Christmas party. It was absolutely amazing... we talked, took pictures, watched our sweet friend Grace's sonogram MOVIE, and ate. Our gifts this year (instead of dirty santa gifts) were baby GIRL gifts for Grace. She's due in April... so next Christmas, we will have our first baby included in our party.
I learned tonight that despite all of us going our separate ways after graduation (think... art history, law, theatre, business, hospitality, nutrition, spanish, & elementary ed), we can still get together and talk as if no time has passed at all.

and we plan to continue this tradition for as long as possible, because we want to celebrate everyone's engagements, children, etc. (Brittany is engaged, Grace is married, & Grace is expecting)... and that's just this year! :)

I am a recovering perfectionist.

This major of mine -- Elementary Education -- has me reflecting on different things related to teaching: my lessons taught, my lessons planned, my lessons written, other teachers' lessons taught/planned/written, and how I plan to manage my classroom next year. I think the past three years of education courses have taught me to reflect on more than simply teaching. I'm becoming more of a reflector on life. I now ask myself questions like, why did I react that way? Why am I hyper around these particular people? Who can I be myself around? Am I truly growing in Christ? What's holding me back from reaching my fullest potential as a servant? (etc...)

I do write a lot down...but being a senior in college, taking a full load and two extra classes + working at McAlister's + babysitting for families at church + teaching first grade Sunday School, 3-4 year olds Cubbies, & Apartment Ministry has me VERY busy... I do not take much time to rest and be still with just me and God.

I figured something though. As a high school and college student, I have been Miss Obsessive Compulsive, Perfectionist with my work. In turn, I have developed an anxiety-related heart condition, not to mention the eating disorder and migraines I developed senior year of high school. All of this for perfection.

I could keep it up, too. As a teacher, I could spend all night every night creating "perfect" lesson plans, thematic units, and projects for students to do. I could expect perfection from each student and become known for "creating perfect little students." This is a problem though. Life is not about being perfect. It is not about reputations, GPAs, MCT 2 scores, or anything of the like. Life is about living. The past several years, I have been living a life that is predictable and completely centered around senseless, temporary academic goals. None of this is going to lead me anywhere except possibly more anxiety-related illnesses. Oh, how I wish I could relive the past several years, just to experience being with people.

No wonder so many teachers end up on antidepressants of some type. Living life this way, expecting perfection in everyone, is no way to live. I should be living my life like this: Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding, in all your ways acknowledge him, and he will direct your paths, OR Be joyful always, pray continually, give thanks in all circumstances for this is God's will for you in Christ Jesus. Teachers on anti-depressants may very well live their lives as growing Christians, but I think that there is still an expectation of perfectionism growing inside each of them.

My goal as a finishing-up college student and as a teacher is to avoid producing perfection out of my students. Instead, I will teach the students to grow in the interests they enjoy and realize the things that they appreciate in life. To enjoy life and its beauty seems to be a far greater concept learned in grade school than mere identifying fractions and writing the perfect cursive Q. If I could complete my first year of teaching knowing that I instilled LOVE rather than perfection in each of my students -- a love for other people, a love for their families, a love for each other, a love of learning new things and growing in intellect, and a love for the lives God's blessed them with -- I will have been a successful first year teacher.

Forget perfection, I'm aiming to teach my students about life & love. :) (and a few cursive Qs will be thrown in there, too, I'm sure.)

sixteen random things about julie

*sixteen* random things about me,
for I was tagged on the facebook,
and I need a break from projects....

i've been working for twelve hours. yep, that's right. :)

okay.

1. I am a perfectionist. Majorly. Everything I do for my university classes must be perfect before I will hand it in. If I send e-mails, I reread them four times before I send them.

2. I read the New Testament one night in high school. I couldn't sleep, and Mark told us once that if you can't sleep, you might as well read your Bible until you fall asleep and not waste your time watching tv. So, I read, and I never fell asleep..

3. When I was in the third grade, I was a bully. I told a little boy in my class to stick his head down the toilet. He told the teacher, and the two of us had to eat in the principal's office.

4. Beth Wynn is one of my absolute, most favorite people ever.

5. I am addicted to yogurt at Yummy Yogurt, and every day, after I teach, I go and get yogurt. This is not a good habit though.. because I only teach twice a week right now. Next semester, I'll be teaching every day. They know me by name there. You can also order "the Julie," and Mrs. Denise will know what it is! (Turkey on croissant, mayo & honeymustard and a fruit cup)

6. I am the biggest teacher's pet alive.

7. In high school, after a stressful day, I would go to Church St's playground and swing by myself. I did this most of my senior year. I should not have taken five advanced placement classes. Mamas, do not let you children do that when they reach that age.

8. I fainted in a Subway one time.

9. I have also fainted in the hallways at Tupelo High School, in Chemistry lab, in my car (in the church parking lot), at Super Summer, in the dentist's office, and out of the shower.

10. I became a Christian in the seventh grade. I grew up in a Methodist church, and it wasn't until I heard Dr. Barnes preach for the very first time that I accepted Christ into my heart. I wanted to run to the front, but my family wouldn't let me because we had to visit around... needless to say, we ended up joining the church. :)

11. I took piano lessons for 10 years, and I still can't really play the piano.

12. I want to learn how to play the guitar so badly.

13. I was secretly a Presbyterian when I lived in Oxford. (I went to RUF instead of BSU).

14. I am about to meet my sister-in-law and seven month old nephew for the very first time in just a few weeks! They live in Hawaii, and Ole Miss School of Education just does not excuse trips to Hawaii... haha.

15. I secretly want to be my math teacher when I grow up. Her name is Dr. Steimle, and she teaches my Math strategies class, and she's the happiest person I've ever met in my life. Gracious me, and she can teach some mathematics. I sit there completely absorbed for three hours every Friday...

16. And lastly, I cannot wait to be a teacher next year. I dream of my future classroom and the things I will do to decorate and plan. I cannot wait to have my own students and my own lesson plans and my own books and my own everything. I am ready....

so there. That was a nice break. I gotta get back to work now!!!!

i may just make it...

If I survive this week, I will make it the remainder of the semester.

Six projects due this week alone. Six! I've done two of them... so I am going to be a busy girl this week.

Today was such a beautiful reminder of rest, community, and innocence at Calvary.

In Kindergarten Sunday school today, one of my five year olds wanted to find the story of David & Jonathan in her brand new Bible. She was so excited about finding it in her Bible and having illustrations to go along with it. I didn't think she could read the story, but after everyone had left, she asked me to read Adam & Eve to her, when I flipped to the story, she started reading it.. She read the WHOLE story... and she's five. I don't know what's in that christian school water but I need to get a hold of some of that. (just kidding)
this was my beautiful example of innocence. watching a child get so excited about the word of God is an amazing thing.

This morning, Bro. David preached about how God's love is unfailing while our love is stretched far too thin. The two loves are uncomparable. As I reflected on his sermon this afternoon, I realized that sometimes, the best way to share God's love with others is to not stretch ourselves too thin... I've been stretching myself, and I think people are really noticing that I'm not Julie right now. Too many people have asked me, "Are you really okay?" after my typical, "I'm great.."

My sweet dear friend Sonia reminded me Friday that slowing down can be a blessing, after having lunch with me. I think I was talking and thinking 100 mph.
Beautiful example of rest. I need to find that time to rest.

Tonight, Bro. David preached about having community with believers in order to grow in faith. I think this is so true... if I did not have my precious family, group of girls, and friends who have stuck with me through thick & thin (R & S; E & M), I'm sure I'd be close to admitting myself into a psych ward.. or maybe I'd be a typical Ole Miss girl. Praise God I have that Christian community to hold me accountable. This reminder, and the reminder to rest, may need to knock me off my feet a couple of times next semester as I experience new changes in my family and balance all of that with student teaching, but God's love in unfailing and I know that his plan is FAR GREATER than anything I can attempt to forsee.


sonia, russ, & me at the Ole Miss Presidential Debate a month ago! :)



Megan, Erica, Sara, Marissa, & Me at the MSU/Alabama game last year.


my girls... when they were in middle school!

I love gentle reminders from God through our new pastor. Somehow, all of his sermons hit me square between the eyes.

McAlister's @ the hospital has hired me for Thanksgiving/Christmas... I love working at McAlister's, and it will be a fun change moving to a brand new, fun location. Hospitals make me very nervous though.. the other day I was helping move tables into the restaraunt, and I was watching this revolving door that never stopped. It made me so jittery. Of course, that door isn't near our restaraunt, but nonetheless... hospitals give me the creeps. Oh, we get free shots... not that this makes me feel ANY better but I just might not get the flu this year! :)

thanks for the prayers and encouragement about the changes in my family! I know it will all be fine and I will grow stronger through it all. And, strangely enough, I found out soon after posting it that Mama's staying put through my semester of student teaching. I love knowing that I will have some family stability. Emphasis on Some.

update for russ. haha.

So.. Russ informed me that I needed an update on my blog.

My life is very crazy right now...

In the midst of my projects and presentations this week, my older brother Don left for Baghdad with the Army, my baby brother Andrew enlisted in the Marines, and my dad is moving to Alabama for his job. Daddy leaves in a few weeks, and Andrew leaves in January. Mama will follow Dad to Alabama soon... not for sure when.


Don & my niece, Anna Kaitlyn.


Andrew & me.

In the meantime, I am staying right here in Tup. I love where I am right now, and I am not feeling any calling from God to move.

My first graders absolutely amaze me every single day. They make me laugh sometimes and sometimes, they make me want to cry, but I have fallen in love with every single one of them this semester. I wish I could just stay on through the remainder of the year. I would get a whole lot more experience doing that and seeing their progress than changing schools and grade levels. It's okay though; I know I'll love wherever I go next semester.

Wave Connection was AMAZING this past weekend. I saw so many of my sweet friends from high school, and I still know just about everyone who is in the show choir... so I guess I'm not too old yet. :)


Sweet Annina! :)


My precious roommate from last year and best friend, Brittany! :)

chicken wings and Alabama football! :)

This week has been busy, busy, but oh so much fun!

Monday & Wednesday, I taught my 5 day lesson plan to my first graders! They learned everything from the voting process, to facts about John McCain and Barack Obama, to the symbols for democratic & republican parties. "Democrat & donkey start with the same /d/ sound."

We had elections for our favorite flavor of ice cream, our favorite barnyard animals, which characters we trusted from the "Three Little Pigs," to finally, our mock election for president.

Here are some pictures from our election week... I took some of the children, but I'm not supposed to post pictures of children from my class. That's okay, these pics are still pretty cute. :)







This weekend, Ole Miss played Alabama, and my sweet best friend, Megan, goes to Alabama! She is going to be a very wealthy, brilliant scientist in a few years.. :)
Anyways.. I spent the weekend with her, meeting and hanging out with her sweet, also brilliant friends, eating at fun places like Mugshots and the honors' college tailgating tent, and going to the game! We lost, but Ole Miss proved themselves in the last half of the game.. Coach Nutt has done wonders for our team. I played it cool in the Alabama student section, only getting excited a little bit each time Ole Miss did something good, but I held onto my Alabama pom-pom just in case someone wanted to start a fight. :)



It's creeping me out that I'm a college senior. I mean, don't get me wrong, I LOVE IT, but when I hung out with all of those 19 year old Alabama students this weekend, I really realized how old I truly am. I mean, after this semester of classes, all I will have left to do is student teaching. That is just crazy!!!!
Oh, and 19 year old girls love to talk about their future weddings and children. It makes me laugh....

the week in review... :)

Last weekend was the Presidential debate at Ole Miss! It was such a fun weekend to be an Ole Miss student. My sweet friends and I picnicked in the Grove and listened to the various bands (including North MS Allstars) who played. The debate itself was amazing. It was kinda scary that it was over after only 90 minutes. Months and months of prep work for ninety minutes of speaking....




Friday, Mary Margaret, Caitlin, & I hit the road (after school) for Clinton. We decided to make a weekend trip to see "The Secret Garden" at MC and shop in Jackson!
After getting lost only twice, we made it just in time for intermission. Tyler was probably very frustrated that we missed the scenes that he was in and had speaking roles during...
afterwards, we went to eat at IHOP (because every other place was closed), and we have some STORIES about that little experience. haha...
Caitlin's mom paid for our room at the Hampton in Clinton, and we slept until 11 o'clock the next morning... Tyler's parents went out to eat with us at this cool restaurant called Bazels in Belhaven. It was amazing.. Then, the girls & I went to Flowood to shop. We shopped until six that evening, and the girls had to literally force me to leave.
It was an amazing weekend.

AND... then, Sunday, I caught food poisoning.. isn't that just lovely? I had to miss a day at church street today which broke my heart. I did get to catch up on my school work though.

:)

btw... my older brother, Don, (on the right) is going back to Iraq this month. He has a brand new baby son & wife in Hawaii, so it will be hard on all of them, as well as all of his family in Mississippi. Please, pray for his safety!!